What+do+YOU+think?

=**6. What do //YOU// think? **= //**They engage others in a dialogue about the issues, seeking their points of view. They listen to alternative points of view, seeking to understand.**//

Such citizens reach out for the ideas and points of view of others. In asking this question, such citizens truly listen. They listen for understanding. They take in more than words, witnessing non-verbal cues. They ask questions: Who, What, Where, When, How? They probe by asking follow-up questions such as “What do you mean?” “What do you really mean?” In other words, they are active listeners. They are making a choice to get to know the other person.

For others to truly share what they think and feel there needs to be a climate of safety and trust. Such citizens create such a climate even when they disagree with the speaker. To deepen the conversation, they might ask, “Have you thought about...?” “Have you considered...?” When there is disagreement, such citizens may respond with "I see it differently."

Now comes the challenge of give and take, with more active listening. This takes patience and perseverance. It is what Debroah Meier calls the ability to engage in "sustained interaction." She claims it is important for kids to see adults engaged in respectul but dogged disagreement. Frances Moore Lappe believes such give and take is "creative conflict," and it is an opportunity break the bonds of status quo thinkiing.

In fact, diversity is not “just a moralistic ‘should” in society. It is important because it can produce better results. From more perspectives come more understanding, more creativity, and more commitment to implementation.

**Resources and Guidelines**
To create a climate of safety and trust Peter Elbow of The University of Massachussets has created "The Believing Game." He did so because he noted too much emphasis on critical thinking in his college students. Students were responding to ideas looking for their flaws. Instead, they would employ the believing game for a period of time, responding to ideas and proposals as if they were the best ideas in the world. This game results in creative, positive thiinking.

In the classroom, to develop the skills of active listening and sustained interaction it is best to engage students in pairs, trios or foursomes.

It is a good habit in any conversation to pause and ask if there is an elephant in the room. What is hanging over our shoulders but is not being discussed? Parent Effectiveness Training and Teacher Effectiveness Training have helpful guidelines for active listening,responsive listening, and reflective listening.

We must create processes and structures that allow for diversity of thought patterns. Some people have different processing speeds, and these differences must be honored. 








 Franklin Covey story of woman on the bus swatting child -- first listen for understanding guarantee hearing of all voices Texas -- have to vote on something 3 times before it can pass balancing power Lani Guanier -- tyranny of the majority -- how do you level the playing field?